When You Get A Good Black Man, Keep Him

So I’ve been quiet for a little while and some of you have been asking how I am. Some of you have even written to me telling me that you miss my articles, well that’s been nice to know that you guys actually like reading what I write. I have been so busy lately, working on other projects and looking after my 6 children. My three youngest especially keeps me so busy, my hands are literally full all the time. Sometimes I also like to take a break from social media, and spend more time in the real world, catching my blessings one by one.

That said, tonight I thought I would do a blog. It was just so random, well I walked into my Boaz sleeping peacefully with our baby son Chaka. It was such a beautiful moment, I took a deep breath looking at them, and I couldn’t help but capture the moment.

Funny enough, today, all day I was just appreciating my husband. I was thinking about how blessed I am to have him. I was telling myself that I really have a good black man, and hes definitely a keeper. I spent all day just meditating on what an amazing talented man he is, and the sacrifices he continues to make for me and the children. He came into my life and made me laugh and smile again. Its the little things he does which makes me realize how special he is, a true King in his own right.

He is mortal though, so he actually is not perfect, lol. Sometimes he gets to me really bad, when he does things that annoy me, I get so angry with him. He does things like picking meat pieces from the pot whilst I am cooking, I find that so rude and unforgivable. Then he leaves banana peals and egg shells on the kitchen work top, oh that literally drives me mad. These are the things I really get angry about, I think we once almost split up because he had picked a chicken piece from the pot as I was cooking. It really became such a big deal , I had to repent and do some serious soul searching, lol.

But when I get angry with him, and stop talking to him, be it over meat or egg shells, my heart literally aches. I experience heart break each time I fight with him.  How awful is that. But more sad is my pride, yes because of my pride, I always want him to reconcile first and apologize, even when I am somewhat wrong. I think its a woman thing, there is something in us which makes us feel like we are always right, our emotions don’t help as well.  I think its the battle of the sexes, that Eve and Adam thing, wanting to rule our men when they are in fact the heads of the house. Oh how wretched we are!

Of course in a lot of cases, we are emotionally weak and vulnerable, making us easy prey for abuse from men, but sometimes as women we are our own enemies in relationships. We just want to rule the men. Our emotions, or lack of control of them, has caused many a good black women to end up single, when they had been blessed with good black men. Yes they are good black men out there, especially from Ghana, and no I am not biased. Its a historically proven fact, lol. So dear black woman, when you get that good black man, keep him. Sometimes its okay as a woman to say you are sorry to your man, and humble yourself and bit your tongue.

Well, my husband is ever so amazing and mature, and when we have our disagreements, he always tries his best to reconcile, he will even kneel down and say sorry. That is normally the best part of our conflicts, the kissing and making up, and laughing our heads off about how silly the fight was, and who did what and said what. My husband is 5 years younger than me, but he acts like he is way older than me. He really is an old soul in a young man’s body. He is such a good young old man, and the children absolutely adore him.

Oh by the way, my husband doesn’t like me wearing heavy make-up or even heavy lipstick, he likes raw beauty, and very minimum makeup. We certainly agree on that and I always try to keep my make-up subtle or non at all, but I think this lipstick goes with my bleached hair and makes me look brighter…

Oh well, this was just one of those random articles, just being grateful that I have a loving and kind man, and I feel myself glowing from his love. So yeah, I just wanted to say to my black sisters, when you get a good black man, do keep him before another sister, or worse more a Becky grabs him.

Mary Tamar was Jean