1st of August is always the most important day of the year for me. On that day each year, I become a year older. It’s that day I came into the world, and I am very grateful that I am still alive and healthy.
But it’s a bittersweet day for me. I’m forced to think about my broken relationship with my mother. I do however have sweet memories of the day I was born. My mother used to tell me that she was happy I came out a girl. From what I heard, I was born on a Sunday, and I was a big hungry baby. I think I was hungry for big things. I was hungry for life. I was hungry for my destiny.
As I get older each year, I look back and ask myself, ‘Am I still hungry, or am I satisfied now?’
A few weeks ago, one lady tried to lecture me on life and told me that I wasn’t born to be a mother. She said I didn’t come into this world to have children.
Well, I told her that I did actually. I was born to be a mother. I take this role more like a calling because it means I get to be the mother I never had.
I have an entire tribe that came out of me. And my destiny is tied to them. They are my biggest fans, especially in everything I am passionate about.
‘Mummy, when are you going to paint again? Mummy when are you going to draw a picture?’ It’s not easy when your children put pressure on you to be your very best. If I don’t get my pencils out and draw regularly, I will be letting them down.
For years now they have been asking me, ‘Mummy when are you going to write your book?’
For the past months they kept asking me, ‘Mummy what chapter are you on now?’
They always remind me of who I am, especially when I forget.
My 6 children remind me that I’ve done pretty well for myself, for a woman who has walked most of her painful journey alone, misunderstood especially by those closest to me, I think I have been awesome. I am every definition of a strong black woman, lol. I am truly blessed. I walk on snakes but they can’t bite me, they stole my destiny but I have retained it.
So yes, it’s my birthday today, I am allowed to be a little conceited.