I got this message in my inbox two days ago, after my post declaring myself the Queen of Kutanda Botso and showing Zimbabweans how it is done in style.
Would I forgive my “mother” if she came and asked for forgiveness? Well, the answer to that is rather complicated. Firstly I do not want her to come and apologize, I’m actually praying she doesn’t. Her hatred and curses for me has done me so much good and with the way things are going, I actually need more of her curses so I can really touch Eldorado with the King. So don’t you all start praying for any reconciliation I haven’t reached the heights of where I am going, please. Allow me to tanda botso in peace please, don’t try to stop the process.
Secondly, my response is of no use anyway, because she is never going to apologize or even admit she ever did anything wrong. If she comes to me to apologize it means she has to now go to her own three children and all her relatives and tell them that she is a liar and a psycho who lied through her teeth to everyone that I slept with her husband, yes my father.
When she used to accuse me of seducing my own father and sleeping with him apparently behind her back when I was 14, I cried so much and was mortified that my own mother thinks I used to sneak into her matriminial bed and sleep with her husband.
“But I never slept with him, how can I sleep with my own father,” I would cry.
“Shut up!” she would hiss at me, “I saw the used condoms in my bedroom each time I went to Harare, I know that you were sleeping with him.”
The saddest thing is I was no naive to her wicked schemes, so I used to actually believe she really thought I slept with my own father.
Until Nino came into my life. So when I was crying telling my King that my own mother accuses me of sleeping with my own father. She believes I did it, I told Nino.
“No she doesn’t. She knows you didn’t sleep with your father. She’s just a psycho who actually wishes you had. It’s a lie she has created in her head to torment you. What’s worse is the relatives she tells and actually believes that a child seduced her father, instead of being appalled that a mother is okay with telling a story of her child being raped and blaming the child making sure that everyone hates the child, there is nothing more sick and twisted than that. I don’t know who is worse, her or her relatives who cheer her on, but one thing I know she is the most wicked woman to ever walk this earth.” My Boaz told me.
And my Boaz was ever so right, I remember after I brought her to the UK she came to torment me so bad one day I broke down and told her straight…
“You hate me!” and she answered, “And you hate me too!”
Now I laugh about this with my king, it’s so ridiculous it’s actually hilarious. I laugh even harder when I see Zimbabweans on my wall celebrating that my so called mother rejected me. One Faith Msipa wrote, “Even your own mother rejected you, you are so cursed!” Like it’s supposed to be an insult to me, when in fact it is an insult to her own culture and people, that they celebrate and glorify wickedness.
So yeah, because of her wicked culture, my so called mother boasts that she hates me. This is supposed to be a mother ya’ll. She couldn’t even bring herself to deny that she hated me. Her excuse for hating me is apparently that I hate her too.
I couldn’t even hate any of my children even if they are to hate me, I can never hate them back, it’s impossible. But this woman who calls herself my mother says she hates me because apparently, I hate her.
So how can she ever say she is sorry, that is admitting that she is not only a hateful human being incapable of basic human mother love, but a pathological liar and a psychopath. What mother fantasies about her teenage daughter being raped by her own husband? She also tried so hard to sneak at me when I was so young and put it in my head that my father wanted me to be “his girlfriend” as she put it.
No wonder she could never even embrace me. This was my birthday 6 years ago, and I asked her for a picture, and she was pulling away from me as I tried to hug her. If you are a body language expert you can tell she is struggling to just hug me back.
So how can she ever apologize? She can’t, and I don’t want her to. I want God to continue to prepare a table for me in her very presence, she is a reader, and I know day and night she sleeps on my blog….
And isn’t my table glorious? Unlike her demonic table where she used to put me on, my table is holy and pure. My table is full of a mother’s love…and a husband’s love…and God’s love…it has white flowers and silks and pure linen…my table is beautiful…
On my table, I kiss my daughter I don’t push her away…
On my table, I walk around in glory carrying my blessings…
On my table, I kneel before my daughter and bless her, not curse…
On my table, I laugh with my daughter, not laugh at her…
On my table, I put my daughter’s shoes on so she can walk, I don’t stop her from walking…
On my table, I want to be the best mother who walked this earth, not the worst…
On my table, I present my daughter to the world, so proud of her, and I let her light shine brighter than mine, I do not let and allow the world to hate her…
And on my table, I don’t want my “mother” to apologize to me. I want prophecy to be fulfilled so I can continue to be “The Queen Of Kutanda Botso”, and I know that the God of Israel, the God of my husband and Lord King Kofi, will never ever allow that apology to happen. Never!
The Genesis Of The Revelation By
Mary-Tamar was Jean
One thought on “Jean, If Your Mother Was To Say Sorry, Would You Forgive her?”
Blessings to you. It must have been so difficult. My wife has a similiar experience but she is really struggling to move away. Any advice?