Why Are Zimbabweans Obsessed With Mental Illness And Diagnosing it?

During my first marriage, I was at the receiving end of being diagnosed of a number of mental disorders, not only by my Zimbabwean ex-husband but by his mother and sisters as well.  This obsession of diagnosing mental illness is something that I didn’t only see in my ex-husband’s family, but I continue to see it online within the Zimbabwean community who read my articles. I tend to ask the question, why are Zimbabweans obsessed with mental illness? Why do they love to diagnose mental illness so much? If anyone doesn’t agree with them, with their way of thinking especially, they are quickly given a diagnoses of some psychological pathological mental disorder, whatever that means. The number of Zimbabwean online psychiatrists is alarming indeed.

Each time I write an article about my life and my journey, I am given a new diagnosis. Some of the mental disorders  I have been given I have not even heard of, and I used to be a mental health nurse.

On Friday,  Shulamite wrote her first blog, and when I posted it on my Facebook page, Zimbabweans flooded my wall with all sorts of mental diagnoses. This time I was given a “Personality Disorder.” lol.

Probably 80 % of Zimbabweans in the UK are mental health nurses. I too trained as a mental health nurse. When I came to the UK that was the culture, if you are Zimbabwean you had to train as a nurse, and most Zimbabweans for some strange reason chose mental health nursing. When you think about it, there are over half a million Zimbabweans living in the UK, and I would think most of these are mental health nurses. Mental health nursing is a trend within the Zimbabwean Diaspora community.

I think madness loves madness. I think madness attracts madness. When I see Zimbabweans online, they strive on madness. They worship people like Tatelicious for example, a man who urinates and defecates live on Facebook, they see this man as their inspiration and role model. I think the reason why most of them are mental health nurses is because as a people, something in them draws them to that profession because deep inside “madness” is part of them. It’s just strange that mental nursing is a “magnet” to them.

My first marriage was to a Zimbabwean mental health nurse. His whole family, his sisters, sister’s in law, brothers and cousins were also mental health nurses.

And boy, I suffered because of that. I was a victim of their “mental nursing.”

Each time I had an argument with my ex- husband, I was given a diagnosis of some psychological disorder. He went as far as going online to google, “symptoms of psycho-pathological disorders.”  He would try so hard to convince me that I was crazy.

He went as far as going to my doctor to tell him that I was mentally deranged, and that I should be treated,  but because the doctor was a normal person, he then recorded it in my GP record that I actually had a very abusive husband, way before I ever knew that I was in an abusive marriage. What husband comes to the GP to bad mouth his wife and mother of his children?

Then each time I made a friend, the first thing he would do is diagnose the friend with some mental disorder. One time he came to pick me up from a friend’s house, and as soon as we got in the car, he started talking about her body language, her lack of eye contact and how she was exhibiting some “underlying mental disorder.”

When I was a mental heath nurse, staff used to joke around that when you are a mental nurse, it’s important to separate work from your personal life. Spending way too much time with mentally unstable people will eventually affect you. They even used to say that to be a mental health nurse you have to be mad too. Personally I never liked the job, so I left after about 2 years of graduating. Maybe if I had chosen midwifery, general or pediatric nursing, something sane, I would have probably still been a nurse today.

But my ex-husband was not even as bad as his sisters and mother, they were even worse with this whole mental illness diagnosing. The biggest abuse I ever suffered in the Zimbabwean community was being told everyday that I was crazy. It was so bad in my first marriage I almost believed it. I went as far as to confess my “madness” to my ex-husband, I even confessed my “madness” to Walter Masocha so he could cast the demons out.

When I finally stood up to them at an Agape Church Service, they quickly gave me a mental diagnosis and called 999 for me to be sectioned. The paramedics came and where shocked by what they saw, the whole church, mostly Zimbabwean mental health nurses, literally stood in a line to tell the paramedics that “I was mental and they were mental health nurses so they had already assessed me on a professional level.” Well, I remember being so scared that day, I almost passed out in shock, I literally saw black and I thought I was going to faint, or even die. I had never felt my heart beat so fast, but the God of Mary-Tamar fought for me against Zimbabwean mental nurses that day and the paramedics felt so sorry for me, they told the “Zim mental health nurses” that what they had done was way out of order.

That was the last day I realized I had to flee from that abusive marriage and Zimbabwean community.  And when the paramedics looked at me and said, “You are not mad sweetheart, you are not crazy okay, you are just being treated very badly, you need to get out of this and keep your children safe.” I hugged the woman who said those words to me, and I took those words and they became my motto.  I whispered to myself over and over, “I am not mad, I am just a woman.” Those words helped me to be the woman I am today.

But what I know is my ex-husband is actually a reflection of Zimbabwe as a country. When I broke up with my mental health obsessed ex-husband, I didn’t know that I was now about to face a whole country who were actually worse than the fool I was married to, Zimbabweans. I have never seen a people so obsessed with diagnosing people with mental illness. I don’t know how many times I have been diagnosed by the Zimbabwean community. They know all the mental disorders and their categories and everything.  Each time I write an article, to them it’s a sign that I should be in hospital, lol.

Even my own family, mother and sister have also diagnosed me, for them they say it’s a spiritual mental illness. They say I have ancestral spirits on me and all sorts of curses follow me because I love to “write nonsense” lol.

PicsArt_05-20-07.55.59
My Ghanaian Family have brought out the best in me

On this journey, my King has helped me literally laugh my head off at all these mental diagnoses I get from Zimbabweans, we always actually joke about it. My Ghanaian family have been so amazing to me, they think I am super intelligent and I have brought nothing but good tidings to their son and family. When I met Boaz and his Ghanaian family, I finally saw myself the way God sees me.

Anyway, on a serious note, if only all these Zimbabwean online psychiatrists and spiritual gurus would at least take their expertise to their country, where it’s actually needed, you would think Zimbabwe would be somewhere. If anything the whole dysfunctional country needs a proper mental health assessment, starting with their president who shocked the world by giving compensation to white farmers.  The curses of that land could not be louder. I have  never seen a country so barbaric, yet out of it comes a people so obsessed with mental illness. Proper oxymoron.

When I show my husband the “mental assessment comments” on me and all the “diagnosis” I am normally given by Zimbabweans, he always says “These people though, why do they love madness and mad talk like that. If they can’t understand anything it automatically goes to a mental assessment.”

I have my own theories about Zimbabwean’s obsession with mental illness, but I will still end with the question, “Why are most Zimbabweans obsessed with mental illness and diagnosing it? “

Is it because the country is infested with madness? I will leave Zimbabweans to ponder and answer that one for themselves, surely they should be able to at least assess themselves and give their country a proper mental diagnosis it deserves.

The Genesis Of The Revelation

Mary-Tamar was Jean

 

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8 thoughts on “Why Are Zimbabweans Obsessed With Mental Illness And Diagnosing it?

  1. When people are constantly talking about you, either they are jealous or you are doing something right.

    I am starting to look at my beliefs as a whole and realizing a lot things I was taught by my very Zimbabwean parents are nothing more than an illusion. Granted I stick to certain cultural aspects as a badge of honor and my identity but even that is an illusion.
    When I first read about your polygamous marriage- I was horrified as it brought up my former past in a cult. But reading your story, its one of love and respect and you all seem happy and that’s is all that matters. I was so convinced that for a second, I thought I could move from the States and be the P.A..like you my sister I have never had strong female bonds. I was always the tomboy..sorry I digress.

    At the end of the day, I love how brave and bold you are and speaking your truth. This could be a better way at looking at marriage and possibly even reduce the divorce rate. We all should be open minded and start looking at things in a different light. May God continue to bless you and your family

    Oh and Shulamite sounds lovely and humble, I read her blog piece and it was so heart felt- may you both take care of each other.
    Much love to you

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Hie Jean.

    Long post here, be patient. . .

    I love your blog. I love your articles. Though I may not agree with everything, what I love most is that you are a woman who is preaching that polygyny is not a sin, Polygyny is not all bad and that normal women can be happy in such a union. The reason why most people hate and despise polygamy is because the only polygamy that they have been exposed to is the polygamy that goes wrong, the polygamy that is synonymous with abuse , violence and negativity, the kind of polygamous stories that sell newspapers and make good clickbait. You on the other hand are trying your best to portray polygamy in a positive light. I appreciate that, because it will help society to have a more balanced view of it. I however feel that the way you label Zimbabwean men and Zimbabweans in general is the same way that some people label polygamy in general. People have seen bad abusive polygamous relationships, forced child marriages etc happening in polygamous communities. Some people have grown up in dysfunctional polygamous families and have seen their mothers ill treated. As a result these people hate polygamy with their hearts and souls ,They then conclude that polygyny must be inherently evil because of their observations and experiences. However you and I probably agree that polygamy cannot be evil and wrong because of the people who mess it up. I think people who think this way are shallowminded, brainwashed and lazy thinkers. I however am worried that the same blanket labelling that ignorant people apply to polygamy seems to be the same blanket labelling you apply to Zimbabweans. I will give a few examples: “I think madness loves madness. I think madness attracts madness. When I see Zimbabweans online, they strive on madness.” another example here: “When I broke up with my mental health obsessed ex-husband, I didn’t know that I was now about to face a whole country who were actually worse than the fool I was married to, Zimbabweans.”

    Going through you articles , over time one can see a trend and may conclude that you may be in war with Zimbabweans in general. Yet the abuse you suffered at the hands of Zimbabweans is only because that is the community that you come from and still are a part of it to an extent. There is no way you could have been abused and ridiculed by Chinese people, they just don’t know you, but trust me there as a chinese version of yourself somewhere being abused and ridiculed and observing the same behaviors that you observe among Zimbabweans today. If you were Malawian or from Mozambique , you would be observing the same negative traits amongst those nationalities, You don’t see it from them because you are not a part of them.

    I think you may have to find ways of attacking issues , without attacking an entire nationality. There are clever ways to raise an issue and even associate it with a particular race and demographic without appearing as if you have a personal war with them. Just one way to do this is to speak on the positive things about Zimbabweans once in a while. Surely surely there must be at least a few things Zimbabweans we have gotten right ? Having a balanced opinion results in more people listening to you and taking you even more seriously.
    I do like you blog anyway. Good work. Keep it up.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you, I enjoyed reading your comment. I always take every rational feedback gracefully. God bless.

      I really think Zimbabweans are very different though, to me anyway, I have in the past tried to be part of them, tried to write my own journey as a Zimbabwean, the abuse I suffered, and I got the most horrific online abuse for simply being myself. So unfortunately, people like you to me are the very minority. As writers, we tend to put people under one blanket, as a nation.

      Even in the bible that’s how all authors addressed nations, for example, Israelites did this and that, Isrealites did evil in the sight of God, yet obviously it wasn’t every Israelite who behaved like that. Generalizing is actually writer’s language, we judge people according to how the majority behave.

      You said Chinese are not mean to me because they don’t know me, but I have a nation who knows me, Ghana. And they publish my articles on their sites, and I have my husband’s family and friends, and never once have I been abused by them, or insulted, but Zimbabweans (Most of them) actually hate me for just being myself.

      As for me, I see Zimbabweans in a certain light, and they have never proven me wrong. It’s unfortunate, but that’s how I see it.

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      1. I agree with the previous poster and have also pointed out to you before tht Ghanaians are not a nation of angels. That you married into a functional Ghanaian family does not ALL families in Ghana are functional. Just because your Ghanaian in laws are nice people does not mean all Ghanaian inlaws are nice people. And just because you grew up in a dysfunctional Zimbabwean family and then married into another dysfunctional Zimbabwean family does not mean EVERY Zimbabwean family is disfunctional. Far from it. I have lived in Ghana. They are NOT a nation of angels. Every dysfunctional behavior you find anywhere else in Zimbabwe and UK you will find it Ghana and west Africa in general. I would say for west Africans marrying is marrying up and could explain their treatment of you. You are a smart woman don’t be so naive as to say entire African countries (which btw are artificial creations of the Berlin conference) can be coloured as evil and not evil.

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      2. But why are you both ignoring the fact that when my articles are posted on Zimbabwe news I get very vulgar, abusive comments, from strangers, just any article of me, nothing to do with Zimbabwe, I get so much abuse from Zimbabweans. Just last week I had to write to IHarare to tell them to stop taking my articles and publishing them because of the horrendous abuse from ALL their commenters.

        When my articles are posted on Ghana sites, I get sane normal comments even from those who disagree with me, I do not get any vulgar or abuse from Ghanaians.

        Why are you guys ignoring the fact that I suffered abuse in the Agape church, which was a big church with 99% Zimbabweans, who even had their own blog at one point, which was dedicated to calling me all sorts of names, I reported the blog and it was taken down by GOOGLE.

        So surely by your own comments, we can all agree that most Zimbabweans are mean horrible people. So by writing standards, it is logical to put them in one bracket because abusive behavior is the behavior of the majority. Of course they are evil Ghanaians out there, but in general Ghanaians are very welcoming and would never abuse anyone the way I have been abused by Zimbabweans.

        I had never seen any human being like me, until Meghan Markle who is HATED by White British people came on the scene. Most of them, 90% of the nation, hates her. I am one woman who is absolutely despised by Zimbabweans as a country, unlike Meghan I just have a platform to write about it, and I’m also a writer so will be obviously very vocal about my experiences in the hands of my Zimbabwean family, Zimbabwean ex husband, Zimbabwean ex in laws and Zimbabwean online community.

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  3. I agree with the previous poster and have also pointed out to you before tht Ghanaians are not a nation of angels. That you married into a functional Ghanaian family does not ALL families in Ghana are functional. Just because your Ghanaian in laws are nice people does not mean all Ghanaian inlaws are nice people. And just because you grew up in a dysfunctional Zimbabwean family and then married into another dysfunctional Zimbabwean family does not mean EVERY Zimbabwean family is disfunctional. Far from it. I have lived in Ghana. They are NOT a nation of angels. Every dysfunctional behavior you find anywhere else in Zimbabwe and UK you will find it Ghana and west Africa in general. I would say for west Africans marrying a southern African is marrying up and could explain their treatment of you. You are a smart woman don’t be so naive as to say entire African countries (which btw are artificial creations of the Berlin conference) can be coloured as evil and not evil.

    Like

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