Before I start this article, I have to say the truth of my heart. I love Hagar. I love her deeply as my sister. I enjoy her company, she is intelligent and we connect on so many levels. She has wooed the whole family with her charm and charisma. The children absolutely adore her, each time she comes over she brings chocolates and treats for them, not the Poundland chocolates they normally get from mummy, but those Belgian luxury chocolates. Not only does she buy them treats, but she also cooks the most delicious vegetarian meals, her food is so good she makes Shulamite a professional caterer look like an amateur. When it comes to cooking, Shulamite has been outnumbered, and the family now prefers Hagar’s vegetarian meals, we never knew Indian Vegetarian food can be that good.
Last weekend Hagar bought me flowers, and she bought my husband perfume. I love flowers, but my King is not the buying flowers type, he says he has no time to pick flowers for a woman, he has only ever bought me flowers about three times.
I always love flowers in my kitchen, so I now just buy myself the flowers to make the home pretty. But I haven’t bought flowers in months, so it was so beautiful to get flowers from Hagar. I also found out her favourite flowers are lilies, they are my favourite too. I love white lilies.
Anyway, she also bought my King perfume, and my husband loved it so much. It smells like him and it is so sexy and calm. I always buy him the Gucci’s and all these popular big-branded perfumes, (typical of a black woman I suppose), but this one bought by Hagar is so good and is so like him. I had to admit I loved it so much on my husband, and I had to thank Hagar for making my husband smell like the King that he is.
So I admit, Hagar is cool, and she is good for me, my children, and my Husband’s empire. She even promised to file and do my nails, I am so hopeless at nail care, and her natural nails are always perfectly manicured. I would be lying if I say I don’t want her as my co-wife.
But, there is a very big BUT…
After everything that happened at the weekend, Hagar reducing me to jealousy and tears, I felt like something was not right, even though my King advised me and comforted me. She is my husband’s third wife and my maiden, she should never ever make me cry.
Though we are all under grace, but God is still the same God yesterday, today and forever. He is still the God of Isreal, and right now He is restoring Isreal. And it goes back to Abrahan, Sarah and Hagar. The promise that God made to Abraham still stands today. Hagar is the mother of the Ishmaelites. And Sarah was once reduced to tears and anguish by Hagar, and she told her husband, “Send away the bondwoman, her son can not share my son’s inheritance.”
On Sunday, my Shulamite and my eldest daughter went shopping, and my husband took the children to a play centre. I was home alone, and I looked in the mirror and I realised that history was happening here. There is no way I should let Hagar take the inheritance of my son Chaka. She will not have her own house, I worked way too hard for my husband to be where he is today.
Funny as I was alone and pondering how to wear my crown best, Hagar texted me and said I should ask the King is she can come to a sleepover.
“He listens to you x…if I ask he will say no, “she texted.
When Hagar texted that, my heart jumped, and I saw that as a confirmation. So God gave me an answer, I needed to speak to my King.
So I went to my closet and prayed. I needed God’s covering to approach my King. The house was still, which is very rare, so I literally called out to the God of my mother Sarah. I needed Sarah’s anointing. I know my husband loves Hagar, I see it, so I knew it would be hard. I anointed myself with oil, and I cooked my husband plantain and chicken stew. I covered my head with a veil, and when my husband came back, I gave him food and told him I needed to speak with him.
He was happy and well-fed. So I struck.
So many times as women, we do not know our power. We do not know that it takes a lot of wisdom to change a man’s heart. We have to know when to speak, and when not to speak. If your man is stressed out, never bring a sensitive issue to him, especially one he’s going to disagree with. Make him happy first, feed him, be it physically or whatever, just feed him, then speak.
So I told him boldly, that I am a black woman, and Hagar is an Asian. I told him that Hagar has never suffered in her life, she has enjoyed wealth and luxury and her family is rich. She has no house of her own because her father denied her because she refused arranged marriages. But this woman knows wealth, and she can see that potential in you, so she loves you.
I told my King that she would have never been with him when he was struggling with no official UK papers. I am the one who suffered with him, who was homeless with him and who even advised him to start LookGold. I told my husband that I was homeless whilst carrying his child, I gave birth to his child with no fixed address. I lost all my housing benefits because the council said I am now living with a man. I was denied a council house because of him, yet I vowed that we would suffer together.
I told him that there is no way Hagar should come today, an Ishmaelite and just be given a house, which is my blood and my children’s inheritance. I told him that Hagar cannot give birth at some point in a house that rightfully belongs to Chaka. I can not give my son’s inheritance to her.
I told my husband that when the house is done up, it should be used for either a serviced apartment or we rent it out and bring more income. We never bought that house to give it out to a wife, we bought it so we can make more money, and that can not change because of Hagar. We have to go back to the original plan, I understand you love her, but she can’t have a house just like that.
I went through my phone and took my King through memory lane, and everything we have been though…
I told him, I said my King you promised me that one day when you take the North and sit on your throne, I will be your Queen.
When I finished speaking and showing him the pictures, my husband had that look, that look that says baby you are so right. But what do I do now? He put his head in his hands and muttered…
“I have promised Hagar the house, she won’t accept it, Jean…”
I looked at him and rubbed his shoulders…Sometimes I am like a mother to my King, very rarely though, I play that role. But I love it when I mother him. Sometimes I love it when he’s vulnerable, and I have the keys to end his stress…
“She can’t live here, the house is too small for three women. And I need an office, you know that, so what do you suggest…” When he asked me, I just looked up and knew God was with me.
“Buy me a mansion. Buy me a bigger house, a house that can house three women, and have space for your own den, your office. You have friends who are millionaires. You have friends who own mansions. I know you to be a tiger, and there is no mountain ever too big for you… you always achieve the impossible, you told me when I was pregnant and homeless and crying in the car, that baby don’t cry, soon I will own all these properties for you. I know you can bring me those keys of my dream house one day, maybe soon, 7 bedrooms, a big playroom, a home cinema and a gym. I know you can do it, and Hagar and Shulamite will live with me in my mansion, I will be their Queen, and they will have their own quarters, just like a proper King’s Harem. And we will live together in peace and harmony, and we will have a lot of fun. And you can bring in as many concubines as you want my King, well not as many as King Solomon, but maybe 5, half of what King David had.”
And I saw the smile at the corner of my King’s mouth, and I saw the fire in his eyes. That tiger in him was awakened. And I knew it was done.
“Hagar is going to kick off.” He sighed, “But don’t worry, I will talk to her. She will be fine.” My King sighed.
And I secretly smiled and thanked my God. Hagar can not have her own house, and my King agreed. And I know one day my King will bring me those keys to my palace.
And I looked at him, and I spoke.
“She asked to come over tonight and sleepover, please allow her. She has to…”
To be continued…