“Jean have you guys had a three way yet? Are you planning of group intimacy?”, I recently got this question from one of my female readers. What I find interesting is that when it comes to intimacy and polygamy, women have the most questions to ask. There is so much mystery about polygamy and what happens on the marriage bed.
What I find very sad with this topic is the taboo and the holier than thou judgments surrounding intimacy in polygamy, yet the media has conditioned us to accept watching monogamous soft porn in movies, and now even gay sex scenes dominate the movie industry. We all watched Game Of Thrones, well most of us did, we were so glued, even Christians watched it, yet most of the scenes included porn and violent rape scenes. But because its a mainstream television series, all the sex scenes were apparently okay for even church goers to watch. That is the hypocrisy of society today, hence I refuse to have my mind morally shaped by the society I live in today.
Now when it comes to polygamy, the only type of marriage which is a taboo in the western world, for some reason, the western world lumps polygamy with the barbaric threesomes which are portrayed in porn videos. The threesomes which are not only unrealistic, but perverse too where the women are touching each other and all sorts of perversion going on, not to mention the sex portrayed in porn is never what happens in real life.
That said, now to answer the question which has been asked by my readers whether Boaz, Shulamite and I have had some sort of three way in our marriage, my answer is our marriage is holy and undefiled. Both Shulamite and I are straight women who will never engage in any intimacy of any sort, we are sisters, we are friends, we hug, we embrace, but our sole purpose is to be the delight of the King.
King David had a harem of 10 concubines and at least 10 wives, probably a little more. During that era, where men had a lot of wives and concubines, and that lifestyle was the norm, men were able to summon 1 wife, or two, or 5 concubines to their Chambers. All the wives and concubines belonged to the King, so he did whatever he wished with them, for his pleasure, there was no rule book as to “How to lie with your wife or wives.”
Today, when a man marries a woman, or even when a man marries a man, or when a woman marries a woman, (since gay marriage is the norm today) no one is intrigued or asks about the sex lives of the married couple, no one starts asking how do you guys do it? We all know how married couples do it. No need to ask. But when it comes to polygamy, everyone starts fantasizing about group sex and threesomes. For a lot, its a guilty pleasure and hidden desire, obviously fed by the misconceptions of what intimacy is like in polygamy.
Polygamy is about a man and his wives, and him doing whatever he wishes with his wives, they are his to satisfy his needs. He is also there to meet their needs. There is no rule book on how its done, though Christians and other religious Zealots have a lot of rules on intimacy in polygamy, yet they will watch a gay sex scene on TV and their seared consciences remain unbothered. But when you mention a man with his wives, suddenly God comes up.
If a man feels like summoning both his wives at the same time, that is his liberty and blessing. If he feels like attending to each wife individually, that is his liberty too. If the wives feel like treating their husband and dressing up for him and giving him a beauty show, that’s their liberty too.
Polygamy is not all about orgies, there is so much happening in such households, the wives are ever so busy giving birth and raising children, half the time they are even tired from the day activities to even think of any orgy. Sometimes they even have differences to solve, and problems to attend to, surely a three way will be the last thing to even consider.
In our household, we simply do what the King commands. Shulamite and I are still getting to know and understand each other. I am her Queen and she is my handmaid. We have had conversations about our King, and I have told her what the King likes. But this is not something which dominates our conversations.
We have had some beautiful time together, properly planned after the King had summoned us to a movie night. After the movie, Boaz worked his magic with his hands, he’s very good at massages, at times he has considered being a massage therapist, but I told him over my dead body, lol. Well he treated me and Shulamite and it felt like a proper spar treatment for both of us, with the most beautiful music and scented oils. I am hopeless at massages though, it is a way of putting me to sleep. I always fall asleep before the massage is over, I always argue with my Boaz that that is the whole point of a massage, to help one fall asleep lol, and when I am gone I am gone. So I have no idea what happened when I feel asleep. Anyhow, since our movie night, Shulamite and I have been asking Boaz for another treatment, but he is not minding us, he doesn’t want it to be overdone I guess, its supposed to be a once in a while treat we look forward to, minus me sleeping.
The King’s birthday is coming up in the next few weeks, and Shulamite and I are planning of dressing up for him, and treating him to something really professional too, like he also treated us. I am taking inspiration from Tamar, who dressed up as a prostitute to seduce Judah, she is one of my favorite biblical characters, she was such a righteous woman, and brave too. She teaches me that sometimes its the most righteous thing to dress up as a harlot, especially for the King, as she did for Judah, and I told Shulamite that that is what we shall do for our King’s birthday, be his own harlots.
For me personally, in this journey of polygamy, God gave me Song Of Solomon. King Solomon on his wedding to the Pharaoh’s daughter, his beloved understood that he is a King, and therefor he has a vineyard, and feeds his flock among the lilies.
So I watch my King and say…
“I am my beloved and he is mine, he feeds his flock among the lilies. My beloved has a vineyard, and he goes down into his garden, to the beds of spices, to feed in the gardens, and to gather lillies…” Song Of Solomon 6
So that’s us, and whether its called 3 way or whatever in this anti polygamy world, that condones all sorts of perversion and soft porn in movies and television in the name of entertainment and art, yet condemns how a man enjoys his wives on his own matrimonial bed in his own home. For Shulamite and I, we are here to serve our King, and do whatever he commands us, we are the desire of his heart.
If a man can’t have wives as the epitome of his inner most desires, then what can he enjoy?
The Genesis Of The Revelation by
Mary-Tamar was Jean Gasho
(Photos from Prince Pierre)