There was a time when I was so lost and brainwashed. I used to kneel before a man out of fear. I gave him a level of respect I had never given to any man. I reverenced him more than I had ever reverenced my own father. This man I knelt before was not my husband, but he was my so-called ‘spiritual’ Daddy.
As shameful as it sounds, I know there are millions of black women in the world who are in this situation. They reverence their Pastors more than their own husbands. Their biggest problem with their husbands is being submissive and obedient, yet they obey every word which comes from their spiritual daddies because they are apparently carrying a word from heaven. They find it belittling and offensive to treat their husbands like kings, but they treat their spiritual daddies/papas as gods.
I can freely judge because I used to be one of those women who thought the only man who was worthy of my uttermost respect was my ‘spiritual Father’.
Everything that he gave me was so sacred, from his dirty face towels to his used anointing water. I went as far as eating his leftover food, yes all married women literally scrambled and fought for ‘Daddy’s’ leftovers because he said his leftovers carried the ultimate anointing.
Dear black women, may I boldly say to you…
If you sleep with Daddy’s face towel on your pillow,
Bath in Daddy’s ‘anointing’ water,
Lotion your melanin skin with Daddy’s ‘anointing’ oil,
Dream of Daddy touching you with his ‘holy’ hands,
Then you are simply a whore and an adulteress.
Because you have made ‘Daddy’ the head of your household, not your husband.
Your husband is the one you should treat as god. Guess what black woman, for you to be the queen that you were created to be, you have to acknowledge that the black man, your own husband, is your god. He is your lord. He is your king. He is your redeemer, not Papa.
You may justify obeying your Papa saying you need a so-called ‘spiritual covering’, well the only spiritual covering you are ever going to have as a woman comes from your own husband.
And if you are not married, you may be blocking your chances of meeting your God-ordained Boaz by wasting your time loving and obeying Papa.
Listen to me, O royal daughter; take to heart what I say.
Forget your people and your family far away.
For your royal husband delights in your beauty;
honor him, for he is your lord, psalm 45
So take all the energy and affection you invest in Papa to your own husband and he will be the happiest man on earth. You will see the blessings that come along with it.
When it comes to obeying your husband, you start bringing out all the quotes about women empowerment, saying you know your worth. You start saying kneeling for your husband is old-fashioned, and women of today are not supposed to. When it comes to submitting to your husband, then you remember that you are a feminist, but when kneeling to Papa, there is no such thing as feminism.
Even God says to you, “You adulteress wife, who takes strangers instead of her husband! Ezekiel 16.
Yes, Papa is a stranger to you, he is not your husband.
You allow Papa to hug you so tight, yet you are a married woman. You allow Papa to even touch you in places that if any other man does, you would join the ‘me too’ movement and report him for sexual assault. You give Papa your love, that love that is spoken of in songs of Solomon. But at home, you become such a cold-hearted ‘bitch’, that angry black woman who is loving towards anyone else but her husband. No wonder the black church has the highest divorce rates.
Even in the circular world, such perversion is unheard of. The only man you should be calling ‘Daddy’ is your husband when you are in your own private chambers. Beyoncé, a circular public figure even understands that. Her Drunk in Love lyrics are more righteous than your perverted ‘Papa daughter relationship’. I love it when she sings that ‘Daddy I want you’, and no, she’s not singing that to her spiritual father like you do in Church, she is singing to her husband.
Where I came from, (the cult I used to be a member of) married women went as far as to sit on ‘Daddy’s’ lap, yet you would never see them sitting on their own husband’s lap.
Dear black woman, stop the papa whoredom and return your love to your husband
5 thoughts on “Dear Black Women, Stop Whoring With Your Spiritual Daddies”
Wow! Brutally honest and thought-provoking to be sure.
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Truer words have never been said. I’ve always had a lot of questions about these “daddy” preachers. What makes them holier than though?
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I always thought refering to a man who is not my father as Daddy was weird regardless of who he is, husband or paster don’t make any difference….
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This is so true. I always used to question why some women in the church openly worshipped their pastors like gods. They completely lost their sense of self direction in life. Without the pastor they practically can’t think for themselves.
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‘Spiritual Daddy’? I have never heard of this term before but then I am not religious. I think, herein lies some weighty advice.